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Jan Snyder asks...You know what the NHL needs? Some players competing on Dancing with the Stars. Sound weird? Stranger things have happened this past week in the big dance we call the NHL.

Dancing with the NHL!

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Game One

by Jan Snyder
Mon. March 30th, 2009

Dancing with the NHL!
The last week or so has seen some odd happenings in the hockey world. Brad Richards of the Dallas Stars came back after breaking his wrist a few weeks ago. In an effort to help the team, he figured he could wear a brace to protect his still-healing right wrist. Well, that worked just fine – until he broke his left hand! Now he’s out again and will need surgery to repair that damage.

In Columbus, Ohio, a Calgary Flames “fan” was arrested for making death threats to Steve Mason, the Blue Jackets goalie. Up to the north, in Ottawa to be exact, police stopped goalie Ray Emery for speeding, took away his license and impounded his car for seven days. Part of the charge was “stunt driving.”

So you see there must be a full moon or some other strange force engulfing the hockey universe.

But it all started with Alex Ovechin and his 50th goal celebration. Alex scored, dropped his stick, and warmed his hands over it like it was hot. Not a big deal, but pretty unusual for hockey, a sport that unlike the NFL, doesn’t often see premeditated celebrations. But now the NFL, or “No Fun League”, doesn’t see them either because penalties are assessed for such an infraction. Even as Pittsburgh Steeler Santonio Holmes caught the winning touchdown in the Super Bowl, the league said he should have been penalized for spiking the ball. Heck, that’s not even a premeditated act and if you can’t do something when you’ve just won the Super Bowl, I don’t know when you can.

I really have no problem with Ovechkin doing what he did and I have no problem with his celebrations at his home rink. I do think he could tone down the antics in other arenas, but it’s hard to change one’s personality and if there is one thing Alex has in spades, it’s personality. So how could we channel Ovie’s excitement and passion? How about signing him up for Dancing with the Stars?

There are rumors about that ESPN will start televising hockey again in the U.S. next season. ESPN is owned by ABC, the network that produces Dancing with the Stars. Football players have done very well on the show so far. Can hockey players be far behind? I would think to promote hockey and welcome it back to ESPN where it belongs, a hockey player or two should be added to an upcoming cast.

This dancin' outfit is just waiting for Alex Ovechkin!

Every new season of the show (which seems to happen several times a year), I swear I won’t watch and won’t get caught up in it. But – I have no self-control and I eventually get pulled in. I’m a sucker for the costumes, not to mention the dancing (and Maks). Athletes have fared well, including Olympic skater Apolo Anton Ohno, Dallas Cowboy great Emmitt Smith, Miami Dolphin Jason Taylor (pictured above) and boxer Layla Ali. Because they are in top shape, have so much determination, are willing to work hard and have a natural competitive bent, athletes morph into fantastic dancers when paired with the right professional dancer.

The closest the show has come to including hockey was when Kristi Yamaguchi took part. She is married to Bret Hedican of the Anaheim Ducks. Although he valiantly cheered her on from the audience, he never danced.
Who could represent the hockey world well? I guess part of the answer lies in the time of year they participate. Our favorite sport has such a long season, including pre and post, that most players wouldn’t be available.

Let’s get creative then. How about some coaches who are now just biding their time and waiting for a phone call? I could envision Michel Thierren dressed in a tuxedo (just like a penguin) performing a beautiful ballroom waltz. How about Guy Carbonneau and his big smile doing a jumpy quick step? I bet the dapper Tom Renney would do himself proud on a charming cha-cha.

The show could create a new category: siblings! Henrik and Daniel Sedin could have a dance off and see if they could keep in perfect synchronicity like twins do. Or all three NHL Staal brothers could try to outdo each other in a Latin dance! Can’t you just picture it?

When Alexei Kovalev played for the Penguins, he would occasionally moonwalk after a goal. He could be a contestant if they fielded an “all hockey player” season. Sean Avery’s fashion sense, that he improved as a Vogue intern last summer, would take over and we’d see him in a colorful Latin puffy-sleeved shirt doing an energetic samba, and looking like Barry Manilow singing Copacabana.

Long-time referee Kerry Fraser already has the “unmovable” hair down pat. Just spray on a tan and he’s ready for his close-up. I can see the handsome Mike Modano and Sheldon Souray sashaying around the dance floor with lovely lady dancers in their arms. And we don’t want to be sexist, so let’s get Christine Simpson out there with Maks.

And in the finale, Don Cherry, who wouldn’t even NEED a costume (he has his suit coats), could go up against Ovechkin. They could each perform a sexy salsa, one with Edyta and one with Karina!

Judges, what do you think of this idea? Carrie Ann? TEN! Len? TEN Bruno? TEN!

This may be the outlet that Ovechkin needs to show his personality. Who knows if it will ever happen, but who could have predicted two broken hands for one player or death threats to a goalie, or speeding tickets, oh wait….maybe that one isn’t so far-fetched.

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